Thursday, February 9,1984

Mom went to the bathroom this morning, which roused me from my sleep. After a few minutes she hadn't come ont, and I went to investigate. She had used the toilet and fell asleep on the bathroom floor. I woke her up and she seemed surprised and embarrassed that she was sleeping on the floor. She ate a little breakfast for me, but she said she was tired and wanted to take a nap. I had to run errands and thought that during her nap would be a perfect time. How wrong I was! When I came back, she had fallen out of bed, scrapped both her knees and elbows, couldn't get up and had nose sniffles. I immediately called the new doctor that I had made an appointment with on February twenty-ninth for Mom, and had him paged. He responded right away and I described Mom's symptoms. He wanted me to bring her to his office tomorrow morning, but I insisted tha she be brought to the emergency room today. He said he would look at her, but he didn't know if she would be admitted. I called an ambulance, and had her taken to, what I consider, the best hospital in the area. She was admitted. So far the tests show that she has an infection, which in itself isn't a problem, but it has sent her blood sugar sky high, above 400. The doctor has already discussed with me the possibility that she might not make it. Last night her mind was very clear, and we talked before she went to bed.. It's so difficult to realize that within twenty-four hours, she's in the hospital and might not live.

Love's records have finally arrived at his hospital, and he doesn't have to have another angiogram today. He will undergo bypass surgery tomorrow.

I have another worry too, the natural gas and electric company, Cilco. The temperature is above thirty-two degrees and is supposed to stay above thirty-two degrees for several days.

I have been into frantically cleaning house, because I don't know what else to do to occupy myself. I am a wreck, just waiting for disaster to strike. I don't feel much of anything except freight.

I haven't called Mom's relatives, because they are all elderly, and I don't want to alarm them unnecessarily. I hope I don't have to call them anytime soon.

If I don't get a call about Mom before her new doctor goes to his office, I am supposed to call him.

It's 4:30AM and I am still up, sleepless, worried and scared. A minister has agreed to call me during Love's surgery to let me know about everything that's going on. I am afraid to go to sleep, because I am so tired that I might not hear the phone.

My thoughts are so jumbled tody, that I can't concentrate on any one subject very long, and might as well not try. Over and out!